Summertime Blues

You know sometimes I forget what it was like pre-children and now that my two are visiting with their Dad and Step-mother I realize just how different my home really is without them.

Instead of being woke up by my beautiful daughter yelling my name from her crib. I am being woke up to a beep, beep, beep. In fact, I let it go off for an hour the second day Gabbie and Daunte' were gone waiting to hear her yell my name. :/

The cry never came and then I realized that the television wasn't on. That is when it dawned on me. My babies weren't home. They are in lovely Mississippi while I sit here in Missouri without them. I have been tempted to get in my car and take that long drive just to see them. Yet, that wouldn't be fair to them or Josh and Bethany.

I have called Josh and Bethany five times since they have been gone. I have to wonder if Bethany is tired of hearing my voice yet. I know I would be.

I thought this would be alot easier than it is. So, what is a mom to do when her children are gone.

I have decided to pour myself into my work. I have worked the entire 7 days straight since they have been gone.

My son turned 6 on June 8th. His first party without me. The first time I have ever had to mail him his birthday presents and what's sad is that it won't be the last.

This summer is the first summer of many that my children won't be home. I think in fact I know I am going to hate this. In fact you may say I will dread it.

Coming home to an empty house without getting my luvies is hard. (Yes I said luvies. In our house that means hugs and kisses.)

I found out today that Gabbie got an owie on her head. Just the idea that I wasn't there to make it better bothered me a whole bunch. It's not that Bethany couldn't make it better it's that I myself wasn't there.

All I do know is that Josh and Bethany are enjoying them for the summer and I am missing them immensely.